All about meI am six feet tall, with brown eyes, defiantly scruffy hair and unique for many reasons. Since I was 15 I have suffered a from IBS-irritiable bowel syndrome. Not poofy "I feel bloated" advert IBS, but intense pain 24h a day forever, immune to all known treatment IBS. This is combined with some unknown hypothalamus malfunction which makes me sleep upto 12 hours per night. Also my metabolism is totally screwed, I eat 10,000 calories a day! Am I a 50 stone wideload scarfing McLARDBURGERS do you ask? No, whilst by now I should be visible from space, I have remained exactly 16 stone for 10 years, thus the mystery. However the fact that all my "ammunition dumps" should be sealed in lead drums and fired into the sun is hardly a case for Mulder and Scully. I am not jokingly described as a walking biological warfare factory for nothing ( I made it up).Ironically, because of the whole wierd metabolism thing I have not physically aged since I was 15 either. I swear the locals can't tell the difference...
This means several things, firstly I may be IMMORTAL (muaha ha), secondly I am on enough nasty medication to kill ordinary mortals; and thirdly, whilst I am intellectually 27, in physicality and psychologically I am also 15. This gives me a unique perspective on things.
I have lots of imagination, from books and all those online naughty stories. Also the whole IBS thing makes me have really strange, elaborate dreams. Apart from the obvious, my fetishistic interests include smoking girls, heels, tattoos, piercings, long sexy fingernails,hot lipstick, sexy corsets, police uniforms, handcuffs and rubber nurses. Tight and shiny is always the best! As you can guess, I filled my time at school downloading things I shouldn't have...
Intelligence wise I have a shitload of GCSE's, 5.5 A levels and half of a Metallurgy degree. Because of my illness, and travelling 3h a day just to reach uni, I missed out on all the sexy fun... Teasingly, my testosterone seems to be the only hormone that still bloody works properly!
Because exam stress messes with the IBS I got screwed by BIRMINGHAM UNIVERSITY (boo, hiss). So now I'm doing a geosciences degree from home instead.
Apparently my brains really are unique because I was born two months premature as a (insert PC word of choice). Somehow my brain repaired itself, meaning I got very smart, very fast. Hell I read Tolkien when I was 8!. When I was sent to the psychiatrists because of my extreme IBS symptoms, they gracefully decided that I am surprisingly not a GIBBERING LUNATIC at all.
I really am a nice person, I love mischievous pets, and I always had lots of friends. Burping at random loudly enough to echo; and very occaisonally gassing entire rooms, lends a kind of anti-charisma to my sarcastic yet funny personality. It can ouch a bit, but people coughing, swearing profanities and pulling clothes over their noses is hilarious. (me:"oh no, not again?!")But then by comparison, one of my girlie friends used her alarm clock as a watch. Maybe my personality attracts cute, sexy oddballs. If any of my girlie friends felt any deeper feelings for me they never professed...
I have nothing in common with local girls, despite living in a supposedly posh area of the Birmingham conurbation, they all drink (I can't), do drugs , and most are uneducated chav scum hanging around bus shelters(local schools have gone waaaaay downhill).I could go hang around my old college but that is probably classed as stalking. Still there must be some smart, sexy women somewhere...
So to sum up, I am a friendly, pretty unusual, quite pervy boy, in need of a gorgeous, sexy, naughty girl to corrupt me. Operators are standing by...
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Supro was probably here.
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Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
But I cannot draw
But naughty stories are good
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Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
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I do not waste my time with jealousy. Especially jealousy over talentless people who are a waste of precious air space. Envy is thin because it bites but never eats.
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Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
--
I do not waste my time with jealousy. Especially jealousy over talentless people who are a waste of precious air space. Envy is thin because it bites but never eats.
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- Trisha Fate
The Afrodiseum
afrodiseum.blogspot.com
MY CHAT: [link]
CURATOR'S ACCOUNT: *NCWeber
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Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
--
...that´s the end and that´s the start of it
that´s the whole and that´s the part of it
that´s the high and that´s the heart of it
that´s the long and that´s the short of it
that´s the best and that´s the test in it...
--
Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
--
...that´s the end and that´s the start of it
that´s the whole and that´s the part of it
that´s the high and that´s the heart of it
that´s the long and that´s the short of it
that´s the best and that´s the test in it...
--
Hi, I am a new author on DA, my work so far includes lots of boobs, smoking fetishism, sky high heels, naughty tattoos, tantalising piercings, tight corsets, shiny rubber, and beautiful women stalking unwary prey...
--
...that´s the end and that´s the start of it
that´s the whole and that´s the part of it
that´s the high and that´s the heart of it
that´s the long and that´s the short of it
that´s the best and that´s the test in it...
--
...that´s the end and that´s the start of it
that´s the whole and that´s the part of it
that´s the high and that´s the heart of it
that´s the long and that´s the short of it
that´s the best and that´s the test in it...
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